When your partner becomes frustrated with you for always attempting to fix things, you may find yourself at a loss for what to do to make things better. You may feel completely discouraged, stressed, and rejected as a result of this. You might begin to believe that you can never do anything correctly. Maybe that’s why you’re searching for “stop trying to fix everything in your relationship.”
One of the reasons this comes up frequently in couples counselling is that one person’s natural approach to supporting the other can be the exact opposite of what their partner actually requires. They don’t know how to communicate about it, so they get frustrated with each other and get stuck in endless arguments. They both feel dismissed and frustrated as a result. Raipur call girls will fix everything in your relationship.
It’s similar to never telling a frantic person to “calm down.” Telling someone to calm down usually has the opposite effect, because it makes the person who is feeling frantic feel dismissed and embarrassed for feeling the way they do. Even if “calming down” is the logical and helpful thing to do, it is impossible to switch into a logical state of mind in the midst of heightened emotions. When we are emotionally triggered, our brains can malfunction and the amygdala can be hijacked. This is important to understand because we are incredibly complex as humans, and we don’t always choose to react in the way we want when we are emotional. This is why it is critical for both partners to work on improving their emotional intelligence and tolerance.
What to do in this situation
- Breathe | Try to breathe consciously when your partner is struggling with something in relationship. Take a few moments to calm your instinct to react by shutting down the emotions and repairing it. Just take a deep breath and remind yourself that you are safe. Consider the first thought that came to mind: “Oh no, here we go again,” or “What did I do wrong?” Also read Believing in Love Again When You’ve Given Up
- Set Boundaries | It is perfectly acceptable to request boundaries when you are feeling overwhelmed and need a moment to gather your thoughts from a flood of emotions. “I hear you, I see you’re upset, and I need a moment to process all of this because emotions can be difficult for me to process,” is a good example of how to request space from an emotional partner. “Can we continue this conversation when I return in a few hours?”
- Work on Feeling Uncomfortable | Improve your tolerance for uncomfortable emotions or conversations. If you struggle with being uncomfortable with your emotions, it may be time to seek your own counselling to help you regulate and process them effectively. Try reading this The Myth of Automatically Finding “Your Love”
- Don’t Assume | When you sense your partner’s vibe is off, your mind automatically jumps to the worst-case scenario. Stop that train of thought, look around, and ask yourself, “Is what I’m assuming/thinking true?” Do I have evidence to back up my automatic thoughts? Is it fair to give my partner the benefit of the doubt?”
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